Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Rejected

I confess. I've been in a bit of a blog funk lately. Have you noticed? Does it show? (Does it make me look fat?) You can all lie and say nice things, but now I know the truth.

It shows.

How do I know? For the first time since the stupid "Follower" thingy appeared on my sidebar, I lost a follower. That was this morning. Tonight? Another one G.O.N.E. gone.

This is not good for my blogging morale.

What is it about blogging funks, anyway? One day I was blogging like mad, with more posts rolling around in my head than I knew what to do with, and the next day there was nothing. Nodda. Zero, zip, zilch. Not only was there nothing, but I didn't even want there to be anything.

I was this close to blog suicide. (Fine. Blog neglect. SERIOUS blog neglect. I don't think I could ever actually terminate my own creation).

I really did consider just stepping semi-permanently away from the whole blog-thing during that absentee week of mine. Why? I have no idea. It's not like I've lost my life to my blog - I know this because that survey "How Addicted To Blogging Are You?" says I'm only 67% addicted, and those surveys are like science. And seriously, 67% is not that bad.

But despite the odds, I rallied the old brain, revved up the computer, and muscled through the funky feelings. And I have to say it is working. Apparently just not fast enough for two of my (un)devoted followers.

Who un-follows, anyway? (And no, I have zero idea who either of them were, although I do know which page of "manage your followers" one of them left from. Just call me Super Sleuth). I mean, as if the whole "Follow Me" thing isn't designed to make people have feelings of self-doubt and desperation. If I didn't love all those little faces (not to mention dogs, cartoons, tools, etc.) staring at me as if crying in unison "WE LOVE YOU!" I wouldn't even subscribe to the dang thing.

But now two of them have left. And I feel the loss. It's kind of like a gaping hole in my monitor's heart. So before any of the rest of you make your grand exodus, and decide to un-follow me, I just want to plead for patience. I swear I'll be totally non-funky sometime in the near future. (It would probably be nearer if people would stop causing all this blog-stress by un-following me. Seriously. Aren't they at all concerned about my emotional blog-state? In fact, there should be a blog-etiquette rule that you never un-follow anyone whom you suspect to be suffering from blog-funk, as this might just push them over the edge and cause blog suicide. All un-following should be saved for stellar posts with record breaking comments to ease the pain of rejection. Don't you think?)

Okay, really, I'll shut-up now. I just had to get that off my chest, and I really am feeling much better. And next time I see you, I'm sure it will be because I'm sharing one of those stellar posts with the record breaking comments.

Wish me luck.

27 comments:

Camille said...

as a professional blog killer, I say it's not worth it. Don't worry about being de-followed, what am I saying, it is a bummer. What are those people thinking, I'll tell you what, they aren't thinking... who are they going to turn to now when they want to read about gay super heroes, or virgin lips of America, limericks, piano students, I can go on, but I won't, just because you are the greatest, and if you lived by my house I would bring you a plateful of cookies and we would watch the bachelor together...and then go bowling.

J. Baxter said...

Machen - for the first time ever, I'm suddenly considering moving to Utah. Why can't we be neighbors?

LisAway said...

Okay, do you want the truth? Should I tell you what I really think? You know that I am very honest, and that I never mean to hurt people's feelings, right?

I think your blogging lately has been fantastic. I LOVED your last post in particular (didn't comment on some previous posts because I was on vacay myself) and can't see how anyone might have left you after reading it.

They must just be trimming down their too-long lists. A few people have un-followed me, including Sue of Navel Gazing, but she can do whatever the heck she wants. But I was looking at my subscribers in Reader and in the last 2 weeks I've lost a load of 'em. But I don't blame them too much. And I've been thinking of a looooooong break from blogging, too, but not just yet.

I think people should make sure that they are regularly reading and loving a blog before they follow. A lot of people don't. And some follow expecting to be followed in return. It's kind of dumb. I agree about loving the faces there, but I wish you couldn't see the number. It would make the whole thing so much better. I moved mine way down in my sidebar in preparation to completely removing it. . .

J. Baxter said...

Lisa - This is why I love you.

And why you're going to Heaven.

And how can you even speak of a looooong blog-break? We need your wit and wisdom!

J. Baxter said...

And if anyone notices that I've commented multiple times myself AND left up that spammer, just remember I'm trying to boost my morale.

And numbers count.

(get it?)

Nutty Hamster Chick said...

Those de-followers will punished in the next life. I am sure, so just hold on to that small comfort. But who cares, who needs them, when you have the rest of us who really care about you and what you write. And I agree with Lisa, I have loved reading your latest stuff. And I feel exactly the same way. It seems as though I have been in a blog funk for about 6 months.

And did you ever think that it could be due to some stress from medical issues facing your extended family members? I know that it is good to have a peaceful feeling about what it going on, but just last week, when I felt at the end of my rope, I cried to myself and said I just want my mommy. Which is not possible right now. So I must suck it up and deal with it.

Sorry to go on and on. I will shut up now. But I think you are more than entitled to a blog funk. So there.

Faithful said...

I had an un-follower once. I made her pay dearly for it later.......just kidding. I like your blog though.

Alison Wonderland said...

See, this is why I neither follow nor have followers. It's too much pressure.

But you can tell yourself that you really have more followers than you think because I'm not on there but I'm definitely following.

That Girl said...

I'm rawther against the whole "follower" thing anyway. I mean, really. I KNOW I've got about 100-150 people who check my blog every day. (statcounter, baby) But only 20 "official" followers. So what's up with the rest? Are they too embarrassed to admit they read my blog? They don't want to shout their bloggy love publicly? Who knows. It's stupid.

Hmmm .... Methinks I feel a post coming on ....

I follow you. Comfort yourself that you have bloggy love from South America!

Claire said...

I'm feeling the bloggy funk too. I even breathed the unspeakable word 'blogicide'.

Maybe we can start up some kind of support meeting, like AA or in our case, BA..bloggers anonymous. SO that we can help each other through the funk..

And who defollows?!!? Weirdos. That's just like getting a kicking when you're down. You better off without them... :)

Barbaloot said...

First off---I totally wanna go bowling with you and Camille!
Second---I only follow two blogs that I jumped into following the first time I saw what it is. I don't really get what following does---but I don't want to de-follow cuz clearly that creates self-doubt:) However, you're fully in my google reader and have been for a long time. Is that okay?

The Grandpa said...

I got defollowed once. Lost one person and within a week had three new ones. Then the person who left came back. Following is like firendship. It's not the number of followers. It's the quality that counts.

The Kooky Queen--Rachel said...

I'll follow you foreva baby! :) That stinks when a "fan" goes bye bye! And blog funks are seriously irritating!!! I'm in one kind of too and really have no idea what to post about anymore. I keep looking at my kids thinking, "C'mon, do something cute so I can blog." Isn't that horrible!? Hahaha, I have a blog illness I think!

evitafjord said...

I don't like to follow because that makes Reader cranky and sometimes it says there's something unread, but there isn't really and so it won't stop saying there is something unread because there's nothing for it to read. I only follow people I probably won't follow for long. If I really want to read your stuff, then I take the time to put you in Reader, even if you don't have the easy link from your blog.

Sadly, on my Reader subscribers I have only one and I'm pretty sure it's me. But I'm on your blogroll (and even a couple of others), so I'm okay with it.

Jen said...

Just think of it this way: you traded in two for me. And I'm SO worth the trade. Kind of like A-Rod. ;-)

Breeda said...

I am still here!
You are too fun to quit!

elesa said...

It's February, I swear. At least, I'm claiming that as the excuse for my funk, so I really hope that it is true.

J. Baxter said...

Elesa - You may have a point. I always have a housekeeping funk in February too, now that you mention it.

annie valentine said...

First, I thought you weren't going to write about this. You know I don't approve.

Second, Lisaway is right and you are fantastic and funny.

Third, I think a lot of women are trying to deblog due to their unstable addictions. Still, like it hurts to follow someone? I follow everyone I can think of just to make them feel good about themselves.

And in the future, if someone else stops following (probably because of this sorry pity party which still managed to be funny), just say these words out loud: "It's okay, Jesus loves me."

annie valentine said...

And here's your 21st comment, just to make you feel good. One over par.

The Crash Test Dummy said...

Oh Jen. I feel your pain. I've had tons of un-followers. Seriously, I have. At least 10. Or almost. And I blog every day so it's not your funk.

At first it hurts a lot, like the first time you had to give an F as a teacher and you felt like it means you're not a good enough teacher to keep your students interested. But after a while you get calloused about it and you realize that there are tons of reasons why people un follow and it doesn't reflect on you. And even if it is you, who cares. You only want the ones who WANT to be there. It's just cleaning house. You're awesome! And blog breaks are good and necessary and SHOULD be taken. We shouldn't feel we have to be tied to the computer in order to remain popUlar! Your true followers love you for YOU no matter how often you come around.

Plus, you like to write. And that's why you blog.

Cassie and Chad said...

I don't know if you remember me, I went to Ricks with you and I am friends with Stephanie Brazier Christenson. I just thought it interesting that I saw you comment on a friend of mines blog in AZ. What a small world for you to know Shelly. Shelly and I went to high school together and now she is battling breast cancer.

Isn't how small the world really is inspiring???

If you don't remember me or if you aren't the Jen I am thinking of from Ricks college please disregard this and have a great day!

Kristin said...

Hi - my name is Kristin and I am one of your un-followers. I have been proudly unfollowing you for 3days and 2 hrs. It is true. You don't bring me flowers anymore, I mean Diet Coke.

Actually, I stopped following everyone, not just you, so don't feel special ok. The secret is I'm still a reader, I agree with evita and I don't like what following does to my reader, it's annoying. So there is one unfollower explained, me. The other probably died and their account got cancelled. So stop crying and think of that other poor unfollower's cat, who is now homeless and at the pound awaiting adoption.

oh and if you really need me to follow you, I could pack my kids up in the car and follow you around town for the day? I didn't think so.

oh and I'm sad to know you don't know all your followers by heart. Shouldn't you know which one has gone astray? Bring them back to the fold? Diet coke and chocolate could work, or threaten to push an air conditioning unit on them...neither of which will work on me, but I'm just saying, I-I-I-I will always love U-u-u-u-U...offically or not.

Anonymous said...

I'm not a follower, but I'm still following.

And I think we all go through blog funk. Every time I finish a blog post, I think it is going to be my last. And then I get another idea, and I write it down. Someday, though, I am going to quit.

Probably tomorrow.

Stephanie said...

You are funny Jen. I don't subscribe to anyone's blog but that doesn't mean that I don't read them. These blog followers probably just didn't want to look like they spend all day on the computer and so they unsubscribed, but they still read your blog. Don't stress about it, you still have us all beat in the e-BFF's. :) Love you toots!

nikkicrumpet said...

HAH who are these ship jumping rats! We've all been in a blog funk...I think it's normal. I got my way out of mine by deciding not to try to post everyday. I was burning out big time. Now I do three or four a week and I feel much less funky. Of course I still read too many blogs so I have not time to shower or wash my hair...so there remains a funky smell in the air. But life is better. I hope your funk lifts and your followers return bearing gifts!!!!

honeypiehorse said...

I can't imagine they stopped following because you weren't blogging as much - that's actually the best time to follow because then you can tell when someone's done a new post if they post infrequently. Were you following them? Blogging is kind of reciprocal. . .