The Big Moment Has Finally Arrived - Heck, I'VE Arrived! It's Post One Hundred People!

Holy One Hundredth Post. Did you know? Have you been counting down, holding your breath, or planning a party? If so, you should have told me. I mean here I was in the midst of a big blog-funk, as my hundredth post loomed closer, and closer.

(Do you realize how close that last complainer-post came to being my only shot at a hundredth post? That would have been so lame).

Anyway. Post one hundred. El-posto uno-hundredito. This should be noteworthy. This NEEDS to be noteworthy. Which leads me to the following question: Why is chewing gum such a novelty to small children?

Do you remember being a kid, and having such a desire to chew gum (especially bubble gum) that you would chew any gum, from anyone, found anywhere? No? I guess it was just me then. And Kelly. (I hope you didn't think you were getting out of this one Kel - I am totally taking you down with me). (But it's all for the good of the Hundredth Post, right?)

Kelly is my niece. We are six months apart (long story) and grew up together. As in, lived right by each other. There were several kids in the neighborhood, and at the tender age of about four or five, we spent our days roaming freely from one house to the next. We were best, best, best friends.

And we lived for bubble gum. Seriously. The older neighbor kids payed their dues to their secret club (The Fuzzy Feet Club - do you remember those little Fuzzy Feet sticker guys?) in bubble gum, and Kelly and I weren't "allowed". And by allowed, I mean we weren't allowed membership, lurking-outside-the-door-ship, rock salt eating privileges (they ate rock salt - it was part of the deal - and we'd sneak in and steal it whenever possible), or anything else that had to do with their club. We never even saw the precious bubblegum stash - we just saw them chewing it.

And then one summer day our ship came in.

It was hot. It was sunny. Kel and I were hanging out doing whatever it is four year olds do, when we ended up on my front porch. Like many porches, ours had its share of cobwebby corners, and dead flies. Poking around in one of these dark corners where the siding had come off, exposing the old studs and ship lap of the porch's construction, something caught our attention.

There in that dark, cobwebby, forgotten corner, stuck in amidst the fly carcasses, was a dream come true. A big, orange, already-been-chewed wad of some unknown person's bubblegum. Jackpot. Eavesdroppers would have heard the following conversation:

Whoever spotted it first: Hey, look - GUM! (While reaching toward the new found treasure)

The other one: Wow! That piece is HUGE! (Admiring the gargantuan size of the orange, chewed up wad as it's being carefully pried off the wall in it's slightly-soft-from-the-heat-of-the-day state)

Spotter: (generously) We'll split it. Just help me pick this stuff off.

And I kid you not, to this day I can remember standing there in the sun on my front porch, picking dead flies, cobwebs, and who knows what else, off of that slightly-sticky piece of gum - splitting it - and gleefully popping it into our mouths simultaneously, discovering it still had a little bit of flavor.

Usually we weren't that lucky.

And you've been wondering what was wrong with me.

Happy One Hundredth Post people! And may you never be desperate enough to chew ABC gum - even if it is big, orange, and not quite chewed out.

*This post is dedicated to my un-follower Kristin who will be thoroughly grossed-out by crunchy flies and ABC gum.