Blind Date Revolution

Last night (well, technically it was early this morning) I dreamed I was single, and went on a blind date. This was one of those really realistic dreams, and while I was dreaming it I actually had the thought, "Hey, I should blog about this." So I'm going to.

For some reason, there were two guys. I was riding in the car with one of them (we'll call him Tom) on the way to his house, and he told me about the other guy (whom we'll call Joe). I wasn't sure why there were two guys, but they didn't know each other either. Tom was pretty cute, and he was supposed to be my actual date. I think. I didn't know anything about Joe.

So then we arrive at Tom's house. He lives with his parents. That's always a good sign. After a little get-to-know-you session with Mom, I go out on the porch and there's Joe. He's not my type. We all just hang out and talk for awhile, and I continue to decide that Joe is definitely not my type. And Tom is looking better and better. Until he says, "Well, you two better get going, hope you have a nice time."

Apparently Tom wasn't digging me, and was handing me off to Joe. Seriously. That's why there were two of them - so if one of them didn't like me he could back out. In my dream I actually thought about Barbaloot at this point, and how we'd have to talk about our blind date disasters.

So then we get up to leave (even though I'm in no way excited about a wasted evening with Joe), when I realize I have to get Tom all set to watch my kids. Don't ask me where my kids came from - I was supposed to be single. Yet there they were, and I had to give Tom and his Mom instructions for putting them to bed.

When that's done, I went to put on my shoes and realized all I have are tennis shoes. White tennis shoes. I NEVER wear tennis shoes. Not only do I feel like they make my legs look short and stumpy, they also make my feet extremely claustrophobic and as soon as I'm sitting down anywhere I have to take them off. But thankfully I remember that my old clogs (which are totally trashed, and probably look worse than the tennies) are somewhere in Tom's basement. So while Joe waits, Tom, his mom and I all go hunt down the clogs.

When they're found, I go back upstairs to leave with Joe, and we have a conversation that goes something like this:

Me: Okay, I found my shoes, we can go now.

Joe: Are you sure you want to?

Me: Well, actually, I've always found that within five minutes of meeting someone, you can tell if you're attracted to them and I'm not really attracted to you.

Joe: I totally agree. It seems like it would be kind of a waste of time.

And then I woke up.

And I started thinking. If only blind dates were that easy to get out of in real life. It makes me think single people should revolutionize the blind date into a twenty minute get-to-know you session, where at the end the two people actually decide whether or not to go on with the date.

Think of all the date frustration this would save! I mean seriously. Did you ever go on a blind date and not know within the first twenty minutes whether or not you wanted to be there? Am I the only one who thinks this just makes so much sense? Or is there someone out there who actually went on a date with someone they were totally not-attracted too, only to find out an hour later he had serious dating potential? And wouldn't blind dates be way less threatening if you knew you were only making a twenty minute commitment, and that it would be accepted and not-rude to back out at that point, and say "Well you're really nice, and it was great to meet you, but I don't think you're my type"?

I'm just saying. They could even call these new kind of dates something. Like Jen Dates. (After all, I am the one who invented them). Then the setter-uppers would say, "Hey Barbaloot, I know this guy I want you to meet. Would you be interested in checking him out on a Jen Date?" Totally non-threatening. Am I the only one who thinks this is a great idea???? Or does this just seem shallow and harsh? I kind of can't decide, so would someone help me?