Bigger Really Is Better

I have some exciting news. Seriously - hold on to your hats people, because....

I GOT A NEW PURSE!!!

I know, you're having a hard time containing your excitement. It's always so exciting when someone else gets a new purse. Actually, however, you really should be happy for me because I've been wanting - no, needing one - for a very long time. As in, over a year. I don't know about anyone else out there, but that is a really long time for me in purse-years. (Kind of like dog-years, i.e., one purse year is equal to about seven people years. And seven is really old for a purse).

Anyhow. For at least six months I've been on the lookout for the perfect purse. When I choose a new purse, it must speak to me. I must LOVE it at first sight, and immediately be able to visualize it gracing my arm/shoulder, and enhancing my entire wardrobe.

I love purses.

This time around, I was looking for something smallish. Something with pockets - as I detest the big open holes most purses these days seem to have. I wanted a print, but nothing too light, because I hate purses that show dirt. And I only wanted one strap - because I hate when you have two, and one of them is continually falling off your shoulder. And I'm cheap. Before the lay-off, my purse-budget was has-to-be-under-twenty. Then the layoff happened, and purse-budget turned into pretty-much-non-existent-so-stop-looking-you're-only-torturing-yourself.

Good thing I'm not someone who has unreasonable expectations, isn't it? I'm sure you're amazed I didn't find this perfect purse long ago...

Then the other night it happened. I was going shopping with the girls to buy stuff for the honeymoon basket, and my mom slipped me ten bucks. (Thank you Mom!!!) We walk into Target, and what do you think we see RIGHT in front of us?

PURSES!! CLEARANCE!! 75% OFF!!!!!

We're talking five bucks. Yessssss. Five minutes later I had selected a VERY large, mostly-white-with-a-little-orange-print, two handled, one-pocket number that was totally cute, for FOUR DOLLARS AND NINETY-EIGHT CENTS. And despite the fact that it is almost completely opposite of what I thought I was looking for, I love it.

It's amazing what a budget can do for indecisive, hard-to-please people, isn't it?

And I'm serious about the love. Ever since buying it I've been wondering why on earth I ever thought I wanted a smallish purse? I can fit my trench coat in this thing! Can I just say how nice it is too be out running around in a trench, think to yourself, "Gee, I'm getting a little warm in this coat," roll it up, give a shove, and realize it totally fits in your ginormous purse?

And what about this summer? It will totally double as a beach bag. The other day I shoved my water bottle, book, and Miss Two's coat in there with room to spare. Heck, on Sunday I fit my scriptures and TWO lesson manuals in this amazing (and possibly magical) purse.

Do you realize what this means? I can be that mom now - you know, the one who has everything under the sun in her purse at all times. It reminds me of a mother's day card I saw, and wanted to buy for my children to give to me in a decade or two. On the outside (with a pic of a fully loaded mom-purse) it said: Mom, Where ever we were, whatever we needed, you were always prepared...(open card and read)...It might have had a life saver stuck to it, but you had it!

So for now anyway, I'm sold. Who cares about back problems when compared with such convenience? Just today my husband was looking in the new purse for something, and his exact words were, "Geez, this thing is like a five gallon bucket."

But way cuter. (Insert imaginary picture, since I no longer even HAVE a computer to download pictures to). Thanks again mom - you're the BEST!

The Dinner Dilema Solved (for one night, anyway)

I am so proud. Last night, I actually remembered to take meat out of the freezer so we could have a nice, easy, throw-it-in-the-oven Sunday dinner. In fact, I was so proud of myself I even made a cake just so I could really feel that June Cleaver feeling. (But I didn't wear pearls. Or even fake ones. I was, however, still in my Sunday clothes, does that count? Dang! I just realized I forgot the apron! Maybe next time...)

Anyhow, I am seriously bad at the whole plan-dinner-ahead thing. Yes Mother, we do have dinner - it's just generally more of a last minute affair, if you know what I mean. This is really rather silly when you think about it, because planning ahead would be so much easier. And things like roasts, and crock pot meals are so convenient. Just throw them in, go about your business, and be around later when it's time to eat.

But I always forget to take the meat out of the freezer. And inevitably, if I buy a nice roast and throw it in the fridge because I think I have a day to stay home and make it, something unexpected comes up (like work - one of the few drawbacks of subbing) and the meat goes uncooked. Then, still hopeful I'll get a chance to throw it in before it expires, I optimistically refuse to relegate it to the roast cemetery otherwise known as my freezer.

And then my days are contrarily plagued by unexpected doctor visits, morning calls to work, and other disruptive things, and the roast gets wasted.

Then there are the times I simply forget I bought it, and it wastes away in the fridge for no good reason whatsoever. So generally, we eat other, less June-Cleaverish kinds of food. Like bean and cheese burritos (yes they're [usually] homemade), chili and cheese fries, spaghetti, and chicken soup (because I can boil chicken when it's frozen).

The other night, however, I was struck with one of those rare dinner-inspirations. Desperate for something to throw together with only a half hour till the ravenous children would begin to tear my house apart in the throes of starvation, I looked in the freezer to see what I could come up with.

Aha! I had a few remaining pieces of boneless chicken (which also doesn't require thawing), and some frozen stir fry veggies. The obvious choice - stir fry.

Except my kids don't really like stir fry. They like the chicken, and one or two of the veggies, but the rice kills it.

And then I had my grand inspiration. I cooked my chicken, added the veggies, made up some sauce, and... threw it over linguine.

A-La-Kung Foo Panda Noodles!

They loved it. It was a HUGE hit. And seriously - who doesn't like linguine? Or Kung Foo Panda? Putting those two things together is a major win-win situation any way you cut it.

So next time you're having creative-dinner fatigue, reach for the linguine, and treat the fam to some good old American/Italian/Chinese food. Your family will thank you. (And then you can thank me).

Going Against All My Principles Because the World Needs To Know

So in case you missed the memo, I HATE CRAFTING. Notice, however that I didn't say I hate "crafts" - just the act of making them. Thanks to a previous post on this topic, I am also relieved to find myself in good company on this one.

Now, while I don't necessarily hate crafts, I must admit that I tend not to be too crazy about anything that looks like someone made it at their kitchen table with a glue gun. Or, anything that screams out "I'M CUTE!" These kind of crafts do absolutely nothing for me. And frankly, even when I've ventured into the intimidating world of "Craft Fairs" I still don't find too many things that suit my taste.

But then sometimes you find something really, super, cool.

That someone made.

Around their kitchen table with a glue gun.

And occasionally, when the stars align and universe sings, and you observe a comet streaking past a total solar eclipse, you find yourself related to one of these glue-gun-geniuses (even if it's only by marriage), whom you realize you've been failing to fully appreciate once you find the online site where they sell their stuff.

And then you feel compelled to go straight to your blog, and tell the world. Because they need to know. So that's what I'm doing. (*Surprise* Tia!)

Now yes, I was aware of some impressive creations from this individual. I have even told others about her talent, and attempted to explain how cool the few things I've seen are. But I had no idea, until I went here, that she was So. Incredibly. Awesome.

Seriously. The creator is my niece-by-marriage Tia Valentine, who is an extremely cool girl, and the name of her boutique-y stuff is Urban Karma. And can I just say that I want to buy one of her amazing signs for Little Miss Two sooooo bad!

So, considering how anti-homemade-craft I am, I figure anything that impresses me this much should be shared with the world. So here you go. Link yourself on over, drool on your keyboard while you check out her stuff, make a selection/wish-list, and then get back over here and let Tia know how cool you think she and her glue gun really are, since there's no place on her craft site for comments.

I can't believe I'm pushing a craft on my blog. The world may end tomorrow. But won't this be a nice surprise for Tia, who has absolutely no idea I just found her craft site and decided she deserves a little attention for being cooler than the average crafter?

(And can you imagine what her scrapbooks must look like? Even I might craft if I could achieve these kinds of results!)

(Oh yes, and please feel free to contact Tia-maker-of-awesome-crafts at valentine@urban-karma.com and order something. Or tell her she's amazing. Or refer her to your friends, because they deserve to know. You can thank me for sending you her way later).

(So did you go there yet? Can you believe she makes that stuff? Out of her own head? Just thinking about trying to come up with anything half that cool makes me tired. Hey! Maybe she'd do some kind of giveaway on my blog for my next limerick contest! I know, I know, earning the title of "The World's Greatest Limerick Writer Ever" is already a HUGE distinction, but there's nothing like taking things up a notch... Feedback people, I need feedback!)