I'm Not Complaining, I'm Fantasizing

A private bathroom, and a walk in closet. I have no doubt that these two little things would change my world. Most of you have heard me complain about sharing one bathroom with five other people, so I won't bore you with those details here. Instead, I'll just tell you all the wonderful things that would happen if I had my own bathroom. And walk-in closet.

First, the bathroom:

1. It would be connected to my bedroom (as opposed to being on a separate floor of the house).

2. Thanks to number one, that would mean I'd have TWO locking doors between myself and a little privacy. I seriously fantasize about this. Never again would my bathing be interrupted by the family network of bowel movements.

3. There would be room for all MY stuff - and I wouldn't be constantly assaulted by everyone else's. And my boys wouldn't be allowed to pee in my toilet EVER.

4. I could have my own towel. And it could have it's own hook. And no one would ever use or abuse it, because of all the locks I would put on the door to ward off potential pee-ers.

5. My jewelry wouldn't be strewn between my upstairs bedroom where I dress, and my downstairs bathroom where I get ready. Seriously. This is getting so old.

6. If I ever were to wake up in the middle of the night needing to use the toilet (which never happens), it would be right there.

7. When plagued by the stomach flu, I would actually be able to lay in bed AND have close proximity to a flushing receptacle. I'm telling all of you with "attached baths" - you don't know how good you have it.

On to the walk-in closet:

1. It would have a door.

2. It would have shelves, hanging rods, and a place for my shoes.

3. If I didn't feel like using the benefits in number three, it wouldn't matter because of number one.

4. It would have a light, so I would no longer have to sneak around undressing in the dark - which happens three hundred forty-nine days a year because of my husband's need for a full eight hours rest. Instead, I would simply walk in to my closet, shut the door, turn on the light, and be able to see where I was actually putting my clothes, which would definitely up the chances that they'd go somewhere besides the floor.

Again, those of you currently blessed with these two modern marvels should be thankful. In fact, you should all get down on your knees right now, and show your gratitude for the blessings of modern architecture, because I fear you may be taking these things totally for granted.

I, on the other hand, will continue to attempt to remind myself that I really am grateful I at least have indoor plumbing, and that I wasn't born in China, because (in the bathroom department anyway) those really would both be way worse. And the rest of the time I'll just be fantasizing about the locks I'd put on my bathroom door, and the full closet wall dedicated to my shoes. It really would be a beautiful thing.

*sigh*