My Stupid Moment

I just had a stupid moment. A stupid Mom moment to be exact. I hate those. You know how we moms (I'm including you all in this group to make myself feel better, please don't disillusion me) all strive to be that mom that has it all together? The one who's always on time, always prepared, looks great, keeps her kitchen spotless at ALL times, baths her children daily, and never yells but speaks soothingly no matter who's beating whom or breaking what? These things do not come easily to me, but I sure do my best. And then I have a stupid Mom moment and reveal the real me to myself and the rest of the world.

When Liam was five years old his dentist showed me his x-rays and prepped me for some serious orthodontia. That was four years ago, and since that moment I have been planning for the appointment he had today.

I watched carefully as his big teeth started growing in, one by one, waiting for the time to be right - that time would be signified by enough permanent teeth and sufficient insurance coverage. This summer I determined that the stars were finally aligned, and made the appointment with the orthodontist I have carefully selected after years of analyzing the teeth of every post-orthodontal patient I could find. I have standards, his grown-up smile is a big deal to me.

Back in June, the appointment was finally secured for July 30th, and like that "has it all together mom" that I try to be, I dutifully wrote it on my calendar. About a week later I got a big blue envelope in the mail with all the pertinent information, and a coupon for one free consultation. Should you miss that appointment without prior notification, you can still get your consultation, but it will cost you $250. Obviously I am not the first to suffer a stupid Mom moment in this situation. This makes me feel marginally better.

I have been talking about, and planning for this appointment since. The problem? In my mind, July 30th was on a Friday. Apparently I am delusional, because on my calendar it clearly shows it to be a Wednesday, and yet I still managed to make this monstrous miscalculation. Why couldn't I have realized this yesterday when I still had time to scramble for a babysitter and get there? Instead I figure it out at 10:30 PM tonight. July 30th. A WEDNESDAY STUPID! (That last remark was directed at myself, so please don't be offended).

Here's the most irritating part. There are several things on that list mentioned above that I'm really not that great at. The 'daily bathing' of my children, for instance. I also do things like set out the vacuum if things don't look great so if someone comes I can say "Oh, I was just about to vacuum," and keep up appearances. Appointments, however, is something I am usually good at. How frustrating is that! Now, when I call in the morning to plead my case and beg for forgiveness and one more shot at a FREE consultation, I will be one more of those mom's who just can't get it together, and DOESN'T EVEN KNOW WHAT DAY OF THE WEEK IT IS!! This is so irritating.

Do these things ever happen to the women who seem to really be that "has it together mom" or do they really have it all together? If there is anyone out there who is, or knows a perfect mother who actually manages to avoid all stupid Mom moments, I would like to meet her and ask her what it's like in her world. Unfortunately, my next remark will be to inform her that we can't be friends. It would be too hard on my self esteem. Sorry. (Kelly, you are absolved - we can still be friends).

So now I'm going to go to bed and spend at least 30 minutes dialoguing out all the possible approaches I can use in the morning when I call the receptionist to beg forgiveness. My phone alarm is set for 9:20 am, so I can remember to make the call (lest my delusional brain tricks me into thinking I'm supposed to call at 9:20 PM), so if anyone happens to read this before then, (9:20 AM on THURSDAY July 31st) please wish me luck - I need that $250.