Thursday, October 2, 2008

The Girl-Child

I totally remember fighting with my sisters - especially Annie - and even occasionally getting into a snit with my best bosom buddy Kelly. There was sassing, there was tattling, and definitely bossing going on. I distinctly remember exchanging insults with Kelly when we were about nine. The very worst thing we could call each other? Miss Priss. For some reason, this was THE insult of the century.

Now I have three boys. They do not fight this way. After the initial incident, their fights go more like this:

Someone gets tackled.

Someone gets choked.

Something gets picked up and used as a weapon.

Something gets broken.

Mom joins the fray, and heads roll.

Can I just say a little bossing and tattling would be refreshing?

Well guess what? I now have a girl. Finally, someone is content to just be prissy (and bossy). I actually call her Miss Priss as a term of endearment - which strikes me as ironic every time. And can I say that this whole girl thing is so unlike any of the boy things I've been through?

Yes, she knows how to sword fight, and has some karate moves, and loves to play in the dirt with her brothers. However. She also likes babies. And kitties. She thinks she's in charge of every human even close to her two year old size, and goes around mothering everything that will let her. Today while I was cleaning the bathroom she brought her baby in, helped it use the toilet, wiped it, and moved to the kitchen where she placed it in the high chair so she could feed it.


Don't get me wrong, I love my boys (and hear they will be WAY easier to raise after the first ten years). And, I even feel comfortable saying I have really nice boys, who get along fairly well with each other.

But it's just different. Like a whole half of me as a mother has been able to come out and play! I'm having so much fun, and enjoying her girliness sooo much, it's prompted me to list the top ten reason's why it's so much fun to have a girl after having three boys:

1. She doesn't pick up every long, stick-like object and wield it like a sword.

2. Or gun.

3. Or break everything that is precious and dear to my heart with said sword-gun-stick.

4. She says things in her sleep like "Pretty, pretty girl", and gets to wear long, silky nightgowns.

5. Potty training. Need I say more?????

6. At football games she already copies the cheerleaders - and I never even pointed them out to her. Like the estrogen sporting female she is, she honed right in on those cute girls waving pom poms around, and instantly got up and did her best to follow along.

7. She may play with her brother's "guys" (even throwing in an occasional sound effect), but if they hurt each other they get reprimanded - and the victim gets patted lovingly while she holds him over her shoulder. Honest. Is that not the cutest thing you've ever heard??

8. She actually wants to be like me, rather than that big redheaded guy all the little boys around here are so smitten with. Finally someone throws herself against the door when I walk out of it! (Not that I want her to hurt herself over me, but gee whiz - for nine years I've watched my husband being followed around by a bunch of little Baxter groupies. FINALLY it's my turn to have a fan!)

9. She already knows how to open and apply makeup. (Okay, okay, I know this isn't necessarily desirable in a two year old - especially when it's mascara, her personal fav, all over her face during sacrament meeting. However. As stated in #8, it's the fact that she's feminine that counts here. She wants to be like ME!)

10. At Christmas and birthdays when she's older, she'll actually be excited to get clothes. And all the other cheap little girly things that most every girl gets thrilled about. And we can do lunch. And decorate her first apartment. And pick out homecoming/prom/wedding dresses. And when she has babies I'll be the actual mother of the mother - rather than just the mother-in-law (translation: she'll want ME there holding the baby and taking care of her). And she'll call me on the phone when I'm old and lonely and we'll chat. And I could go on, and on, and on.

I know that everything on this list does not come guaranteed with a girl-child. There are no "for sure's" with your children because they will grow up and do their thing. I know of lots of women who do not have this kind of a relationship with their daughter(s), and I know there's a chance Meara and I won't actually be soul mates.

But if we're not, it won't be because I didn't pray constantly that we would be.

So for right now, I'm just going to plan on things turning out this way regardless, because any other option is completely unimaginable and unthinkable at the moment. So wish me luck, and enjoy your girls - they are SO MUCH FUN!!!!


LisAway said...

Love this list. Especially number 10 with it's forward-lookingness. You definitely deserved a girl after three boys!

When we were in a hotel last week and my two boys were playing in the bathroom, Evie came and laid by me on the bed and said, "Let's talk mom." When I asked what about she said, "Girl stuff!" I loved that.

Anonymous said...

Whoop, whoop! THIS IS MY WORLD! When I was pregnant with my fourth, and we wondered if we should find out if it was going to be another girl or our first boy, some friends of ours (with three sons) came to stay for a weekend in our new house with new laminate flooring. When they left, we had about a dozen new chips in said flooring, and my hubby turned to me as we closed the door behind them and said, "Honey, I don't think I could do a boy."

By that point, of course, it would have been too late either way. But thankfully, Heavenly Father already new it because he sent us our Sophie, and thank heavens because I really, seriously, wouldn't know what to do with a boy!!

Natalie said...

I love this post! As a fellow mommy of 3 boys & then a girl I get it. Plus, Meara really is an exceptionally feminine little angel. I love that she is a little mother hen to everything (even her brother's toy guys.) Too cute!

Heidi said...

I thoroughly enjoy my two little son is not quite like yours though, probably because he has no brothers! Maybe when the new baby bro shows up it will throw things completely out of whack.

And how come your daughter was so much easier to potty train??? NOT FAIR! I'm going through it right now with daughter #2 and I can only dream of her being as easy as my son. (My older daughter was even worse-- not potty trained until she was 4!)

Kimberly said...

I think when she's older she'll enjoy this reading this more than any child would enjoy looking at a scrapbook page. What a wonderful tribute...what a wonderful way to capture these memories of her.

Whitney R said...

Awwe, this was sweet. My mom had three boys and then there was me :) And then my little sister. That's one of the things I'm looking forward to. Having a baby and my mom can finally be the mommy of the mommy. And I want a boy first... but after listening to you talk about your little girl, I think I might want one of those.... :)

Kelly said...

Oh, how I long for that kind of girl! Your little Meara sounds adorable with all of her girlie things. I know when I found out I was having a girl, all of the things you mentioned ran through my head and implanted. And then I got Kelsi...

Wonderful, darling girl that she is, loves make-up, loves pretty dresses, etc. But, doesn't pat her babies, but shoves them in her cart or backpack, doesn't follow and emulate me, but uses her karate kicks on me, the couch, the rock wall outside Michael's...

She is my little lady though and I pray we will have the relationship you described one day, although right now she is the type of girl who says, "I am a lady and if you say I am not, I'll slug you!" (insert sneer and grrr here).

Marivic_Little GrumpyAngel said...

I love this post especially the "list". I'm a mother of one very girly daughter so that explains that. I really enjoyed my baby girl. I still enjoy her now that she's a teen ager but let's be honest she's a little more hormonal :-) Plus clothes, make up, those add up. Still I enjoy having a daughter and shopping consultant. She keeps me "hip" :-) So I am glad I have her. You can look forward to continued fun times with your baby girl for sure. She sounds so adorable.

ade said...

Ohhh, what a great post and Meara is so adorable. Your kids are so beautiful...they are lucky to have ya.

Keep up the great mommying!!
Great activity this evening too - my fam had a ball.

Love ya,

Kristy E.B. said...

I totally agree how much fun it is to be a mom to a girly girl! So much fun!

Alison Wonderland said...

Nature vs. nurture my @$$. Girls and boys are different because they come out different. Any parent who has at least one of each knows that.
I had my girl first and then my three boys and I won't say that one's necessarily easier than the other but each can be fun.

Annie Valentine said...

And they love to shop. At Ross.

Melissa Bastow said...

I also enjoy my girls a bit more than my boys - possibly because I never had brothers growing up and HOLY COW BOYS ARE WEIRD.

At the beginning of your post I thought it said that some ONE would be picked up and used as a weapon. I laughed. But only a little. That has happened at our house and my kids are still really young......I'M SO SCARED!!!!!

Stephanie said...

Oh, I just love my sweet and sour little girl, but your post made me love her even more. Thanks Jen. :)