Thursday, September 25, 2008

Due To Circumstances Beyond Our Control, We're Forced To Take The Easy Post-Writing Way Out: yes, it's another contest, with yet another (lame) prize.

I have to apologize for my posting delinquency. Usually by now I would have something (whether it was worth reading or not) to offer those of you who bless me with your visits. (Those of you who leave me your comments are a class above the mere blessers - you are Blog-Angels). But frankly, this has not been a fabulous week, and I am not feeling very witty.

Actually, I'm feeling extremely witty about one topic - but unfortunately, I've decided it wouldn't really be the best thing for me to blog about. This topic is the one regarding the not-so-fabulous-week I've been having, and I'd really enjoy nothing better than telling all of you out there in bloggy land just what a complete idiot I can be. Unfortunately, however, there are other people involved in my latest escapade,who might not appreciate it if I strung the whole thing out for everyone's entertainment.

But it's also the only thing I can think about, making post-writing about other things extremely challenging.

So instead, let's just have a nice little limerick contest, shall we???

Topic: Laundry. This is in honor of the dirty laundry I don't dare hang on the blog to dry. So get your limerick-y brains ready, and remember the rules:

1. It has to have something to do with laundry.

2. It has to have five lines.

3. Lines 1,2,5 need to rhyme.

4. Lines 3,4 need to rhyme.

5. The meter is very simple, just check out the limericks on my sidebar - or keep reading, because I'm about to throw a couple of my own out there just to get you all warmed up!!!

Laundry is really a pain.
It's enough to drive you insane.
It never will cease,
And the piles just increase
Till you just want to leave on a train.


That was admittedly horrible. Undaunted, however, I will try again.

Oh where is a match for this sock?
I think that my socks all must walk.
I bought ninety-three,
Now where can they be?
If only my washer could talk!


Not much better, but let's not forget that I'm having a bad week. Apparently this impairs one's "limericking" ability. I better try to redeem myself one last time:

While laundry can be such a chore,
A regular, bummer and bore,
There's those who just smile
And hum all the while,
And when it's all done they want more.


This last is based on true events. If you don't believe me click here. And leave her a comment, because anyone who feels this way about laundry deserves a LOT of Blog-Angel love!!!

And now, I will turn it over to all of you hopeful limerick winners! Leave your entries in the comments, and I'll give you until Sunday night. Number of entries is unlimited, and the (lame)prize is still an honored place on my sidebar, and the title of "World's Best Limerick Writer Ever". Such an honor! But just breathe deep, and try not to let your nerves get you!!

21 comments:

Kimberly Vanderhorst said...

Umm...I've never written a limerick before but I'll try to come up with something.

Maybe.

But probably not. 'Cause I'm super lazy and forgetful to boot.

You made me giggle though.

Little GrumpyAngel said...

Wow, you're very talented with this limerick thing. I'm not sure if I can even do it. I'll think about it and see if I'm worthy to put in an entry and come back later.

I love how your posts make me smile at the very least.

LisAway said...

The kid's room is a place I can't go
their clothing in piles they throw
the dirty and clean
they mix, 'cause they're mean
My thoughts? You do NOT want to know!

This one somewhat inspired by Yoda. I'm fairly sure I can do better than this. I'll be back.

Kelly said...

Good post, you are good at limericks, but you know my brain is dead when it comes to that sort of thing. I did try last time-couldn't even put one together. Too bad, so sad for me.

Oh, thanks for the laundry shout-out.

McFarland Family said...

With laundry you always must sort
Dark, colors or whites to report
It's all just for me
I'm the washer you see
It's a good thing they say life is short.


I'm really now good, but I tried this time.

J. Baxter said...

Mcfarland and Lisa - you guys rock. Love the limericks, they made my day.

Everyone else - So happy to see you this morning! Do I need to write a "limerick how-to" post? Because I totally could. There is a secret formula for success...

Natalie said...

a limerick of laundry I've not,
money for a maid I have sought,
I just wish you'd leak,
details on your bad week,
so call me & just share that thought!

melissabastow said...

Because one just wasn't enough:

Who really needs a laundry day?
In the hamper the clothes will stay.
Washing’s a drag,
Plus, my boobs sag.
So no laundry today, just PLAY!

There once was a girl from the Ozarks
Who hated sorting whites from the darks.
Her clothes came out blotchy,
Stained, ruined and splotchy.
And I always kill it with the last line because I stink at this…arks.

So your laundry is something you don’t want to do.
Sorry your week has been filled with poo poo.
Vent if you will,
No one will think ill.
And there’s a little something on my blog for YOU.

annie valentine said...

When laundry comes down to the wire
and loads simply sit in the dryer
I vacate the house
Like a sniveling mouse
To escape all the muck and the mire
(Because I'm potty training)

J. Baxter said...

Anyone wanting a good chuckle needs to go to Melissa's sight and check it out.

It's totally worth the trip, and VERY creative!

Anonymous said...

When doing laundry, I've cried,
"Oh, help! Your tips, please confide!"
Whites don't go with peach
Stay away from the bleach
Lest everything comes out tie-dyed!

I hang out my clothes on the line
The sun dries them crispy, but fine
I'll save a few dimes
But spend so much time
Hunting socks that aren't even mine.

Jen, I'm going to give up trying to have contests of my own. Yours are so much more fun!

Natalie said...

How on earth did that Melissa lady get such a life like picture of you?

Whitney R said...

Ah Hem....

I have massive amounts of laundry to do
I wash all of these loads only for two
Some ask me why I do all nine
I ask myself also because it takes so much time
but if you love him what else can you do

If I can think of another, I'll be back

Oh and it's true, I wash, whites church shirts, G's, everything else that is white, work shirts, work pants, non work pants, colors, towels and socks. Nine separate loads for just the two of us every time it's laundry time. I MUST love him because if it were up to me we'd do 4 separate loads.

Alison Wonderland said...

My husband, the laundry he does,
The water, the soap and the suds.
He's best it it true,
And I'm sorry for you.
Because it is me that he loves.

Oh c'mon they kind of rhyme.


A limerick 'bout laundry is tough.
I think I'm not trying enough.
Of sorting some write.
How to keep colors bright.
This last line is hard so I'll slough.


I'll be back with more. Bwahahahaha!

J. Baxter said...

Things are really heating up now - Sue Q is back for blood (she's the reigning limerick champ) and we have some new additions to our contest (very nicely done Alison, I could tell from the limerick of the other day that you showed real promise).

As of now, there are several fabulous entries, but not a clear winner...

LisAway said...

My house is one big laundry pile.
Well, there's two, but they each stretch a mile.
There's "dirty" and "clean"
(and some in between)
You'd never know underneath there is tile!

LisAway said...

With laundry you'd never think
How very bad it can stink:
One little error,
The cause of such terror
One red sock turns all the whites pink!

Alison Wonderland said...

My daughter just puked on her sheet.
The baby, his diapers they leak.
Which leaves me in a quandary,
I refuse to do laundry,
But my house it is staring to reek.

Is it weird that I just keep thinking these up? I can't stop myself.

annie valentine said...

Lisa, you are ALL OVER IT!

Here I go again (since Jenny likes to call and say, "Have you posted another limerick yet? Are you gonna? Huh? Huh?")

Some people just don't do laundry
This bad habit leads to a quandary
When undies are dirty
Buy more or be flirty?
That disposable pile of sundry

(this last word I had to look up in the dictionary to see if I could make fit and am still not sure if I used it right).

My laundry has many baskets
Green,yellow--all tiskets and taskets
I often lose count
of each basket's amount
It's just one more nail in my casket

Anonymous said...

Wow, there's some really tough competition this time. I'm not sure I'm up to another challenge, but I'll give it another go 'round...

It's time to do one more batch
Of laundry and socks that don't match
I'd much rather blog
Or kiss a green frog
'Stead of washing, I'll just light a match!

J. Baxter said...

Lisa. So glad you came back because those are genius!!

Alison, it is not weird that this is happening to you - unless you think I'm weird.

Welcome to my world. (And your latest entry is on the list.)

Annie - you are a good sister. Not sure about "sundry", but you get an "A" in family support:)